It has been a really long time since I have written a post. Over six months actually. A few seasons have come and gone. The last post I wrote was titled Bolted Down. If you haven’t read it, go ahead and take a look. After I wrote that post, the wind blew and God spoke very clearly. With our family’s foundation built firmly on Christ and our faith bolted down, we were ready for the wind to blow us anywhere it wanted us to go.
And blow it did!
Early on, when we partnered in purchasing this property, I resisted the idea of ever living at Evergreen Bend Farm. I thought, “Let’s keep the mess, the dirt and the garbage far away.” I mean, friends, look at this mess! Can you relate?
I found peace and contentment in returning to
a clean, neat home after a day at the farm.
I often thought, “Let’s enjoy the property on the weekends, embrace the open space to run and ride. Let’s spend as much time as we desire and then, when we are tired, let’s go home.”
Home…a clean, neat, orderly spot that is easy, convenient and comfortable. A refuge.
Over time, the boys eagerness and drive to spend every waking hour working, cleaning, and building, began to wear away at this mama’s heart. They loved it at the farm. And the farm loved them. It was a perfect match.
Nobody asked me if we could live on the farm; nobody asked me to give up what was comfortable, clean and neat. They didn’t ask me to let go of my refuge. In fact, they were just as surprised as I was when God quietly and quickly changed my perspective, my heart and my desire to do what He would soon ask me to do.
In His infinite wisdom and with overwhelming love, he knew that a move would crush me. So, He lavished on grace and created in me a new heart for this land. The land that He had provided. The land that I now love.
He gave me a desire to uproot the comfortable, let go of the old and embrace the new. He prepared me for reckless abandonment of my refuge. I am not saying it was easy. It wasn’t. It still isn’t.
But, we did it. We moved.
Unfortunately, the wind didn’t blow gently or slowly-in fact it was more like a derecho. A wide spread, long-lived straight-line wind storm. It was fast moving, increasing in speed and determination as it traveled where it would go.
In the late winter, February of 2018, we began rehabbing the tenant (guest) house, anticipating a move in October of 2018. By then, the small (1000 ft) home would surely be ready for our family of seven. It would be an adventure, a challenge, and a lifestyle change to downsize from our 2800 sq ft neighborhood home. Everyone was on board to try our hand at living in a large “tiny house.”
However, things did not go as we had planned.
We quickly were caught up in a whirlwind.
In March, we were asked to host a wedding for October 20th, in a barn that still needed much work. The house progress was deferred.
In April, our great friends expressed an interest in buying our house. Subsequently, they put their home on the market; and in no time, it sold.
In August, on the 17th they closed. Our move out date was August 10th. That little tenant house we were rehabbing was nowhere close to being ready. . . But God provided.
Against everything I had previously said I would ever do, with a realization and an awareness that I possessed no control of my situation, I literally threw all caution to that wind. I didn’t have the power to dictate where we lived, slept or played. I wasn’t even in control of what each day would bring. I began living in the now. Trusting each minute, each day, and fully realizing that when God says He is in control of all things, He means ALL things. We can’t pick or choose can we? His word is clear, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5: 6-7)
Humble I did, trusting He would lift us up in His time.
That old 1900’s farmhouse was going to work.
We rapidly assessed the plumbing, the electrical and the smell. With the help of many friends we made the most needed changes, like electrical outlets in the kitchen, and a coat of fresh paint in the rooms. Within weeks we tucked a majority of our belongings into storage; and keeping clothes, mattresses and a bit of furniture, we moved into the 1901 white farmhouse on the corner of Aden Road.
I am in a new bed now, with a new roof over my head,
and a new view out my window.
A new kitchen to prepare our meals and my own hands to clean our dishes.
A new place to play,
A new place to climb,
So much to explore!
These past months have been filled with so much change, so much new — and a lot of letting go. Letting go of what was and accepting with reckless abandonment where the Holy Spirit leads me. The wind has blown me in a million directions. Each direction I went, I desired to share but was blown away again before I had the chance. Our family has been consumed by the tasks at hand. Simply living. We have been preparing for a wedding, fixing barns, laying concrete, building houses, collecting animals and so much more! For a while, simply living was harder, longer, dirtier and more time consuming. In the late summer, it was HOTTER! There were no screens on the windows. There was nothing quick, easy, clean or neat about it. The few times I actually did sit down to write, the amount of words and thoughts to share were immense, way too intense for the time I had.
I am sorry it has been such a long time.